Welcome to
The Gate Keepers-
Who: The Winston’s Three, the boys who guard the door at Winston’s on their coveted Thursday, Saturday and Monday nights.
Why: Because you want to party with the Hiltons, the Olsens, half the staff of Endeavor and anyone associated with the Huvane Dynasty too! (Youngest brother, Chris, is a partner in the bar.)
Intro Line: “I’m friends with Al.” (Al is another owner who’s rarely there. Say you met him at 24 Hour Fitness.)
The Hyphenate-
Who: Dead sexy Canadian Jew, Seth Rogan.
Why: Because his films consistently gross over 100 million dollars, he’s been nominated for an Emmy, and he can ingratiate you to the Judd Apatow Gravy Train Posse. So what if he’s got the kind of love handle/belly rolls that could smuggle drugs through
Intro Line: “Wanna play Green Hornet and Wonder Woman?”
*Added bonus, you kill three clichés with one fell swoop: writer-producer-actor! Hooray for
The Meal Ticket-
Who: Tom Collichio, Crafty Daddy.
Why: Because Craft’s West Cost incarnation is strictly for Ballers with expense accounts and the name recognition to get a table. Once inside, you’ll have access to 99% of CAA and the clients they love.
Intro Line: “Your Wagyu Rib Eye blows my mind!”
The Girl Friday-
Who: Debbie Liebling, Foxy Mama.
Why: Because Trey Parker and Matt Stone have an altar devoted to her and she’s responsible for bringing “Borat” to a theater near you. Does the word “Zeitgeist” ring a bell?
Intro line: “So…I hear you dig Chocolate Salty Balls.”
The Mouth-
Who: Perez Hilton (Hey, we didn’t say this would be easy).
Why: Because his blog gets about 55 million hits a month. One mention and you’re in the pantheon of Brit Brit, La Lohan, and Brangelina.
Intro Line: “I got your scoop right here.”
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